Category Archives: bad movies

006 It’s Better To Shoot A Nun

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Watch yourself, because Luka is full of rage this week. This week’s news is so full of losers that she must berate them for the low-life scum that they are. Then she reviews Darkness Falls, a film so gawd-awful bad as to make her suggest doing optical damage to yourself rather than put yourself through watching it. Oh yeah, it’s that bad. As if that wasn’t enough, for no good reason we came up with a string of lies that children often get told and tragically believe. Just a fair warning, boys and girls: some illusions will be shattered.

Not all is wrath and fury, though. Skullard turns the tables on Luka, subjecting her to his own version of the Anime Lyrics Game. Will he have his revenge? And in a wonderfully pleasant surprise, Luka gets “naughty” for all to hear. Our explicit rating is well-earned this week. In all, this episode is a heaping helping of bad words, worse accents, and good intentions gone terribly wrong. What could go wrong? Listen, find out, and enjoy!

Don’t you think it’s past time we had a tooth’s point of view? Here’s this week’s educational short:

005 I Just Love a Good Sting

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Despite stifling heat and Skullard’s lack of a shirt, we’re back with another full episode of nerdy goodness. Neither rain nor sleet nor sweaty headphones are going to keep us from getting you the audio fodder you need to fritter away an otherwise valuable hour of your life.

This week, as usual, we start with the news, which covers everything from bad yogurt and mutilation of spouses to public transportation and exorcist conventions. We love keeping you informed. Then we’re off to the movies again with another Bad Movie Review (Dun-dun-DAHHHH . . .) in which Luka tells you in no uncertain terms, Don’t Look In The Basement! (1973)

Against all better judgment, Skullard demands another rematch of the Anime Lyrics Game with predictable results. Finally, our anime this week is Kuroshitsuji, or Black Butler, which defies the old saying, “You can’t get good help these days,” so long as you have a flexible definition of the word good.

I have to admit, the two of us are pretty amused with ourselves this week. We hope you enjoy listening as much as we like blathering on.

Kuroshitsuji (The Black Butler): Four Stars for season one, Two stars for season two. Luka thinks Sebastian is one hell of a butler.

And now, please become excited by clips from Don’t Look in the Basement!


Use the axe, Judge! What could go wrong?


Charlotte receives a dire warning – through rhyme.


Allyson really wants to get her phone fixed. She wants it fixed hard.

And finally, fresh from 1948 comes the thrilling educational short Build Your Vocabulary! Your mind shall be expanded and your life shall be enriched.

004 Up On Top of the World

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Just in time for July 4th, we give you a podcast to help you declare your independance by putting on headphones and not talking to anyone for an hour. Lots of stupid news this week, much of which comes from Ohio. Not sure if that deserves some kind of award or extra supervision. Luka reviews House (1986), a horror comedy that combines The Greatest American Hero, Cheers, the Vietnam war, extradimensional portals and your ex-wife. She also shows off her secret talent (prepare yourself). We play the Anime Lyric Game again in our Random Encounter, and then we talk Kimi ni Todoke, an angst-ridden romance anime that gets high praise. Also, Skullard has a few choice words to say about Chrome Shelled Regios. It’s a full hour plus of American pride and Canadian meh. Enjoy!

Kimi ni Todoke (5 Stars from Luka and Skullard)

003 It’s the Magic Number

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Good Lawd, we had a lot to say. Episode three kicks off with so much news that you’ll puke. In a bag. At least 35 pounds worth. And then the bag will be stolen by the neighborhood cat. Luka lambasts The Ruins, a teen-screamer where the plants have more personality than the protagonists. We roll the die for another Random Encounter, this time spurring a spontaneous product endorsement that, in retrospect, we really should have been paid for. Skullard gushes in his anime review of Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu, most likely because he relates so closely to the main character. All of this flies at you at a whiplash pace if you have a history of poor neck support. Enjoy!


Dusty steals a toy dinosaur. For what purpose? The world may never know.

Baka to Test to Shokanju: Four Stars. Goofy Fun!

002 Why Are Kittens Fuzzy?

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The second episode brings terrifying news: people can just come to your door and demand to give you an enema. Among that and other news stories, Luka brings the awful truth of Maniac(1934), a psycho horror tale in which animals may or may not have been harmed during the filming, but they certainly were pissed. We have our first anime discussion with a celebration of Ninja Nonsense, where following the bouncing ball could well get you molested. We’ll also talk about some actual nonsense from some of the people we’ve met out in public, and then round things off with another Random Encounter. All of this in less time than it takes to hypnotize yourself in the mirror. Remember when you did that? No? Forget I said anything. Enjoy!

As promised in the podcast, we’d also like to share some video clips from Maniac:


Buckley goes crazy broadway-style after being injected with super-adrenaline!


A strange man explains his new business venture – a self-sustaining cat fur farm.


And finally, two hysterical women battle in a dank cellar. Why? No reason.

Ninja Nonsense: Four Stars. A thing of wacky beauty.

001 How To Boil An Egg

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What’s going on in our premier episode? Crows are attacking policemen. The British are feeding their dinner guests spoiled food off the floor. Granny takes a post-mortem field trip. Various forms of animal crap are examined and explained. Skullard gives his recipe for his personal “Breakfast of Champions”. Plus, we talk about how we categorize bad movies and have a Random Encounter. All in all, a first effort worthy of our show’s title. Please enjoy!