067 Freezing

Here at What Could Go Wrong? we believe in climate change. Of more immediate importance though, at least to us, is climate control. We turn up the thermostat . . . and nothing happens. We jiggle the thermostat, still nothing. We take the casing off, fiddle with things we know not, and fuck all happens. We swear at it through chattering teeth and it just hangs there, heedless on the wall. Perhaps it’s frozen there? We know a thing or two about freezing ever since the heat went out. Not a word from the landlord; not a peep from the property managers. It’s like we’ve been left out on an ice flow, alone and forgotten. Luckily, the stove still works. Boiling water may be muggy and coat all the windows with condensation, but at least we’re not encased in ice. Oh, and soundboard’s working too, so that means we can keep ourself warm by working up a sweat over this latest episode. Hopefully by next week Demon Lord Dante studios (Demon Lord Dante?) will be habitable again. In fact, we’re sure it will! C’mon, what could go wrong? No, really . . . what?

Tormented (1960) is a great film about a rotten guy who shoves his mistress off a light house. Unfortunately for him, she comes back from her watery grave to nag him to death. That’s a helluva way to go . . . either time! This Good Unintentionally Bad Movie is one Luka has enjoyed many times. Let’s face it, the undead nattering of spurned harlots never gets old. Please enjoy this scene wherein Tom (that jerk!) takes the direct approach with Vi’s disembodied head that refuses to shut the hell up.

Don’t agree with our suggestion that Christmas is the holiday of Greed? Here’s some footage of Black Fridays past that may bolster our assertion. WARNING: this video contains disturbing images of people allowed to vote and have children.

Do the other kids invite you to their lunch table? Do you get invited to weenie roasts? Do you look well? ARE YOU POPULAR? Find out by watching this week’s Educational Short! Or don’t. What the fuck do we care? It’s not like you ever invited us to YOUR weenie roasts. We don’t even eat weenies, so who gives a shit? Think we give a crap about sitting at your lousey table? Fuck you.

From Skullard’s Postcard Collection: Geez, everybody’s getting a head this week.