041 That Was Totally Uncalled For

Today’s podcast was brought to you by Alan, the internet repair guy. In true What Could Go Wrong? fashion, just as soon as we finish the show, our internet goes kablooie. Luckily, there are guys like Alan who can climb utility poles in the pouring rain, risking life and limb so that we can continue to blather to an uncaring world and have uninterrupted access to porn. So this episode is dedicated to him, and his ability to show up on time, get right to work, and not trying to engage us in any small talk because who cares about anything he has to say? If he wants to be all chatty, let him start his own podcast. Or maybe he has friends he can talk to. That must be cool. He looked like the kind of guy who showers, so it isn’t out of the question. Good for him. Yay Alan!

This week’s Bad Movie Review takes the listener down the fetid, nasty spiral that is Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988 ). Perhaps the most frightening thing this movie has to offer is all the 80’s hair, but if feathered bangs and soft perms aren’t scary enough, there’s popcorn guns and balloon animals. Death by comedy is a sadly under-explored genre, but this film doesn’t do enough to fill that aching need inside you for killer slapstick. Instead, you get latex masks; fun in moderation, but irritating when overused. Here’s Luka’s advice about this Kinda Lousey Intentionally Bad Movie: just watch the trailer. It spoils everything, and just about all the good bits are included. Save yourself time and heartache, unless you really have a thing for clowns. Or klowns.

http://youtu.be/fHXy8DpF5k0

Beware world travelers bearing gifts . . .

From Skullard’s Postcard Collection:

Yo Steve! When you gonna join me down at OGFC?

Occupy Gus’ Fried Chicken? C’mon, bird, you know I ain’t into that.

I’m down there mic checkin’ every damn day, and I ain’t got nobody backin’ me up.

Give it up, Herschel. You need to drop that shit and find yourself some hos and get roostin’.

They’re called “hens”, Steve. Have some respect for the sisters.

Bird, you need to get laid.

Your mama laid you.

What the fu- . . . ah, shit. Yeah, that’s right. That’s deep, brother.

Word, bird.

Are you growing up? Are you facing difficult emotional setbacks, like losing a sword-fight, or seeing your boyfriend out on a date with his sister? Toward Emotional Maturity (1954) will provide you with important advice!

Behold the perfect berry. It is wonderous, and worthy of praise.